'Tis the season….

Ok, so almost a year ago, we uprooted our whole existence, the plans we had and the dreams we shared, and moved from the city to a small rural town.

A town where “Shopping Malls staying open till 8 at night” became a vague and distant memory for me, the café on the corner selling (the best) slap chips, fish and russians became a reality, a town where the Bottle Store in the main road is the local tourist attraction.

I have to admit, I was a bit negative about this place in the beginning, and it took some time to get use to it all.

But a few days ago, I saw a total different side to this town, a side that was filled with blinking lights and Christmas cheer. Streets in the centre of town where blocked off and closed down. Kids were playing and running around in the streets, laughing.

 

People came with cooler bags and fold-up chairs. And they all came to celebrate for the same reason.

 

The municipality erected a huge Christmas Tree in the centre of the town, which was decorated with countless lights and shiny decorations.

We all sang together as groups performed Christmas Carols from the stage. There was a huge stampede of little tiny feet as all the kids rushed forward to meet Father Christmas and his elves, some more enthusiastic than others. (I realised that my Biekies prefer to appreciate him from a distance, and they profoundly refused to go near him for a photo or two).

After an hour or so, the streets were littered with partially eaten candy canes, and we had to do all possible to keep littlest from sticking each and every one of them in her mouth.

  



Just before 8 the big announcement was made, all the lights were turned off, the streets turned dark…and then…and then we started the count-down from 10.

I could see the enthusiasm and excitement beam from Hanco’s face as he waited in anticipation, and then, as the count-down reached the end, town centre was illuminated with the brightest lights one could ever imagined as they turned on the lights of the Christmas Tree. We cheered, yelled, clapped hands and whistled. It was truly amazing.

And I cried, yes, I cried, cause since turning 30 I am an emotional mess-ball and I cry about everything…

I cried tears of happiness, because even thought it was for just one evening, we managed to move all our issues and differences aside and celebrate the joys this season bring.

But I also cried some tears of heartache, thinking of those near and dear for who this season will not be as festive, for those in grieve, for those longing for just one more moment of laughter, one more moment of joy, one more moment of love. And it is those that I will keep close to my heart in this time, for them I will pray that they find comfort and that they will be embraced by our Heavenly Father’s healing hands.

Most of our Christmas shopping is done, only a few more gifts we need to buy, but not only will we be buying gifts this season, we will also be buying school shoes, a school bag, school outfits and stationary as we are preparing to enter a whole new stage in life. Because as of next year, my Biekie will be a Gr. 0 student…be still my heart…

So, as our kitchen window proudly displays his own set of blinking Christmas lights, we are anticipatingly awaiting the arrival of Grandma and Grandpa Botha for a long awaited and much needed visit

Letting go….

From the word “go” after I found out I was pregnant with H, I knew everything would change, my whole world transformed, my life came to a cross road where decisions were made and I was not the one making them….but they were for the better, and if I look back, not a day goes by where I regret the decisions that were made, in fact I LOVE them, I love my littlest Biekies more than ever!

I vowed to always be there for them, with every smile and through every tear, to love them, cherish them but even more, cherish every moment that I spent with them, because those are the moments that last a life time.

But disappointingly, I came to the realization that as a mother, I cannot always be there for them, there will be moments in life where they will have to face the world on their own, not only to learn from it and become a better person, but also to build inner strength and confidence, which to me, is two of the more valuable lessons to learn in life.

And last week was one of those moments, my littlest went to visit his Granddad for the week, yes, and whole week, that is a total of 6 nights where my Biekie was not sleeping at home, in his own bed, in his room next to mine….

I put on a brave face as we drove away last Sunday, with my Biekie sitting on my father’s shoulder, smiling and waving goodbye, on the outside I was smiling and waving a final goodbye back at him, but my insides were shattering at the thought of having to leave him behind. And yes, I knew he would be fine, and that my dad would not allow anything to happen to him, and that he would take care of him (almost as good as I would have done…), but how do you tell the mother-heart to be still?

They went fishing on Monday, he caught two fish, and as he told me of those two fish, I could just hear his little voice bursting of proudness, and once again I had to tell my mother-heart to “calm down and be still”, cause I was so proud of him that my chest actually hurt.

We phoned him every night, got updated on their daily doings, on how much he got spoiled, what they ate and how much he loves us.

He missed the littlest, and she missed him, both of them got overly excited when they heard each other’s voices over the phone, littlest would grab the phone from my hand, press it tightly against her ear and just listen as her brother rambled away….and dare try and take that phone from her hand….

On the littlest side of the Biekies…it was as if sister knew she was the only one left and in total control for the time being. She blossomed and bloomed, she transformed into an independent little soul in the blink of an eye, and although she missed her brother, I think she enjoyed being in charge, only if it was for a little while.

Christmas is around the corner, less than a month to go. The town is slowly but surely transforming into every child (and most adults) dream, with shining, flashing Christmas lights in the shape of stars, candles, etc, appearing on lamp posts all around town. In the middle of the town, a massive Christmas Tree is being erected and decorated. On Christmas Day, the Big Red Truck will drive around town, handing out sweets and goodies to all the children whilst Christmas Carols stream from the big speakers fitted on the roof of the truck.

But we are once again reminded to be humble, to be grateful and to give thanks for what we have, cause each new day presented to us is borrowed time, it is a gift from the Heavenly Father, and we should never forget that.

I heard some very wise words from a “Johnny Walker” ad on TV the other night (who would have thought), and it said : It is not what is underneath the Christmas Tree that matters, but who surrounds it… No further explanation needed

Well, I have all my Biekies back under one roof, our Christmas Tree is proudly displaying its decorations from the corner of the living room, and, as soon as Daddy fixes the other set of Christmas lights, will the kitchen window be hosting its own set of blinking lights this year…

Being lots-of-things-less...

A blog without pictures is like a day for me without having coffee, lifeless. But I am forced to do pictureless blogging, as my laptop underwent a few minor adjustments and repairs. Got it back this morning, with a new look, new brains, faster hardware...all brand spanking new, and I am sure I'm gonna love it, can not wait to get my fingers all flying across the keyboard.

Speaking of being something-less....for the next couple of weeks I will also be Blackberry-less seeing that my Blackberry is now a Brokenberry....damm thing fell out of my hand and the screen went all "stars and stripes" from black to white...and then...and then there was nothing. But I don't mind going back to basics when it comes to the cell phone technology, yes sure, the Blackberry is so convenient, having everyone available at the touch of a button, but hey, I still have my PC, which is basically the "Ark of Noah" version of the Blackberry. But not having my Blackberry constantly by my side (or in my hand) makes more time for the smaller, more important things (which, by the way, should not have been said out loud...)

We spent last weekend in Centurion with some friends, and what a wonderful time we had, a well deserved refresh and recharge (actually scary to think that we had to leave the "platteland" and visit the city for a recharge!). Z and I attended Monz’s baby shower, where I realized that Z will most probably turn into a shoe-thief as she looked at Marilè’s shoes with those longing-needy eyes, Daddy and H went 3D Smurfing, we braaied, we laughed, we talked (and talked some more, till 2am the next morning), I had coffee with the girls and yes, we managed some shopping as well! Don’t you just love the city-life?

There are days where it truly feels as if this small little town is suffocating us, strangling every last bit of life out of us, sucking us dry and withering our souls. But we are fighting back, with a decent amount of ass-whooping, because we are from the city, and we are not scared of this little town, and because "WE can" (our new motto - Neither I, nor you but WE can)

We have such a busy schedule planned for the following weeks, our first family photo shoot coming up, then we have a kitchen tea and bachelors to attend, then the school Christmas Party, then a wedding. Damm, just diarizing all of this is making me long for a holiday!

This coming week end will be a quiet one for us, just us, the Biekies, some laziness, arts and crafts and maybe some baking, but I know for sure that I will be loving it!

Repeat itself…repeat itself…repeat itself…

Yes, that is what I wish last weekend could do, repeat itself just once or twice more. We had such a lovely time celebrating my 30th birthday….and yes, I finally turned 30! I passed the 16 year mark, the 18 year mark, I passed 21 and also 25…and then I waited patiently for 30 to show on my doorstep and wave me hallo, and it did, finally!

I really don’t know why I was so excited turning 30, maybe because “30” just sound so fabulous and voluptuous. Maybe because the girls from Sex and the City reminded me of being “30-something” and they made it look so fun and exciting, mind you, if Sex and the City remind me of being 30, why does Desperate Housewives remind me of being 40?

And yes, baking was once again included in our weekend. Think I am getting addicted to box-baking, it is so plain, simple and easy, that it even makes me look good, and I love it! Maybe one day, some day in the near future I will have to graduate from box-baking to grown up-baking, yes….some day…but until then, the Biekies and I enjoy our selection of boxes.

On the Saturday we went to Magic Garden nursery, bought some plants, herbs and flowers to decorate the gardens of my mom and sister (and I have to admit, mom’s garden looks quite cute after the make-over), and afterwards we had lunch, filled with conversations, laughter and Biekies running all over the place. Z had a silly standoff with a hen (which by the way, was trying to protect her chicks).

We also spend some time at the Vaal Show, walked through hundreds and hundreds of little stalls, rode the mechanical bull (warning: said activity should not be attempted of you are anything shorter than 1.70m, cause me and my whopping 1.64m body took longer to get on the bull than it took me to stay on the bull…).


We also realised that H has much more of an adventurous spirit than we ever thought, he climbed higher than my heart (and nerves) could handle, went on rides that I never could imagined, he even attempted the mechanical bull, was a bit shocked when he landed on his behind…but, he enjoyed it.

Z looked amused as familiar faces passed her again and again as the rides went around and around, and she even dared it on the carousel horses, slowly going up and down, smiling every time she passed us

I am, to be honest; deeply petrified of any amusement park ride, from the Anaconda at Gold Reef City, to the “Cup and Saucer” you get at the local amusement park. I don’t know why and how, all I know is that I am petrified and scared to death of these rides. But, with it being my 30th birthday, and having a fabulous time with the family and not wanting to spoil the mood of the stunning day we were having, I agreed to join mom and my sister when they said we should do the “Cup and Saucer” ride. As we stood in line I could already feel my knees going jelly, my stomach trying to find the emergency exit and my mouth going drier than any desert could ever be….but I braved it, cause I am 30! And if H can do it, so can his mommy!

But guess what? It started raining!! Call it faith, call it Murphy, call it Karma, call it whatever you please, but let’s admit, the rain saved my lucky stars from going on that evil, evil ride!

We ended the day with dirty muddy feet, hair all wet and tangled, Biekies trying to hide their faces from the cold, splashing raindrops, some good old KFC and tired bodies falling asleep on couches in front of the TV…but…it was a great, fabulous day.

So, let’s cheers to turning 30!

Mad-hatter Weekend…

My glass was not half-full this weekend, it was over-flowing, with blessings pouring from the sides like water from the edge of a waterfall.

It was great! This was just what I needed, as I was feeling a little dull and smothered for a while now, but this weekend did me good, my soul was recharged, re-energized….amazing

We played, we laughed, and we spent time with family.

We had messy doughy fingers and faces as we spent some time in the kitchen, baking and icing some cupcakes.



We had littlest Biekies with dirty faces sharing loving moments with littlest birdies.

 

We also had a littlest screaming in fear and terror when she had to sit on the back of a horse for the first time. From a distance she loved and admired the horse, and that is where she decided to stay….far enough away from the horse cause that is what she felt comfortable with.

We had beautiful blue skies, with sunshine warming you to the centre of your being, we had welcoming sunrises and breathtaking sunsets.

Little Miss Biekie-bouter decided to wake up a tad bit early on Sunday morning, and as I lay in bed, the most beautiful “Mamma’s” came from her room next door from ours. We snuck to the kitchen, and with her next to me on the kitchen counter, we mixed together a “wake-up-and-get-your-ass-into-gear” cup of coffee accompanied by a batch of “oh-so-lovely” chocolate mint muffins.

I’m also showcasing “oh-so-adventurous-daring-super-hot” red toes, and we still have pretty-pink, gorgeous-green and beautiful-blue waiting their turns patiently.

I am looking forward to this coming weekend, as I will be celebrating my 30th birthday.  I actually can't wait to hit the BIG 3-0, as it is a new chapter in my life and I intend to enjoy is to the fullest!  So here is to 30...cheers!

Meet the…..Tooth Fairy

A few days ago, we had to make a small trip to hospital as they needed to do some dental procedures on H, nothing dramatic, he is just to small to sit quietly in the dentist’s chair for long enough, so he had to get some anaesthesia. All went fine and dandy, and he handled everything like a real champ, no hassles and no worries.


(Left : Mommy & Me, Centre : On my way to theater, Right : All fine and dandy after the procedure)


It sucks to have a physical (or bodily, if you can call it that) weakness, for me it was having to wear glasses from approx 12 years of age, I hated it, and after 18 years of having to wear them, I still hate them. But for H, his teeth is his physical weakness, he’s been battling with weak baby teeth ever since he had teeth in his mouth, and unfortunately we were not able to win the baby-teeth-battle, and therefore the 4 (top) front teeth had to be extracted.

 

(Doing the silly's as we waited to go into theater)


But needless to say, he is very proud of the fact that the Tooth Fairy came to fetch those teeth….

Week-end madness….

What a lovely week-end, we ditched the usual routine and settled for something different this time…we planted, we baked, we planned, we played and we laughed…and it was fun

We planted….We finished our first DIY project this week-end, yes, we finally planted something in that damm empty pot, and not only that pot, we planted a second pot, and to “cherry-on-top” the whole DIY experience, we planted a tree in the front garden, our first step towards the whole gardening venture.

But I have to admit, I truly and utterly felt lost in the nursery on Saturday, I don’t have the slightest idea what to do and where to start when it comes to gardening, and I fear with my (extremely) limited knowledge regarding gardening, I might be more foe than friend to any garden, pot or plant.

We baked….Z and I baked some Chocolate Brownies Saturday evening, or let’s rather say that I followed the instructions on the back of the box on how to assembled the Chocolate Brownies mixture, and Z found it necessary the poke around with her finger in the mixture whilst carefully watching daddy as he stole some chocolate chips from the mixture. Whether or not I baked or settled for assembling, the Chocolate Brownies still came out divine!

We played and laughed…We all played “touch” with H Sunday afternoon, like a bunch of school kids we ran around the front yard, chasing each other, all the while laughing till we had no breath left. I love seeing happy, smiling faces on my littlest Biekies, it makes me all warm and mushy on this inside.

We planned…almost every evening this week-end, Guilm and I would sit on the steps outside kitchen-door, talking about what lies ahead, I love pre-planning life (although all does not always go as planned), it gives me some sort of direction. And yes, there was some form of disagreement, but for most of it we agreed on, and love the ideas that floated around. We’ll make it work, we just need a little time and space to accomplish all.

But we were also remembered of the sadness in life as we commemorated 10 years since the 9/11 tragedy. It really felt like yesterday, and I don’t think I will ever forget the images I saw and the pain and sorrow I felt as I watched it all unfold on TV…I pulled the coffee table as close as possible in front of the TV, and I sat down on top of the coffee table, as I watched with horror, trying to imagine what those people were thinking, what they were feeling as they were in the midst of it all, as they tried to escape, fighting with every ounce they had in them, to stay alive…

I remember all those people who tried their utmost best to safe those in distress, without thinking of themselves for one second, how, not only a nation, a country, but the world, stood together, embracing one another, giving comfort.

I wondered how a person can allow himself to turn so stone-cold, to not care about something as precious as life, about the families being left behind, the heart-ache, the pain, the tears that were caused with the decisions made.

And yet, after 10 years passed, I am reminded about the promise to keep going, no matter what…to never give up.

Creating the old into something new…..

With Spring that has sprung, I’m really getting “creative itches”, so, to hubby’s utter dismay, I decided that I have the three following D.I.Y. projects that I would like to attempt….

No 1 : White wash the Chest of Drawers and floating bookshelves for Zhané’s room, I just want to do something a bit different with her room, so I'm thinking - girlie coastal, so let’s see how far I get with this one….

No. 2 : Plant something in that damm empty pot! We have this flippen empty pot that was empty when we lived in Centurion, was still empty after we moved to Meyerton (to my mom’s house) and is STILL empty after we moved into our house, and I think the time has come for the pot to be un-empty! So will twist and pull hubby’s arm for a trip to Magic Garden for a few accessories and go green!

No. 3 : Create a “something” for that little nook at the front door. Although we hardly use the front door and hardly anybody will ever see the “something” in the nook at the front door, at least I will know about the “something” in the nook at the front door….and the “something” will make me feel better

I am pretty sure I can do this, seeing that I am not stupid, only lacking experience (and way to much of it, some would say)….


And then there is the future-dated D.I.Y. Projects…..

No. 1 : How about we create a garden out of our “a-whole-lot-of-space-of-nothingness”, which some people might call a yard, seeing that our yard consist out of paving (a lot of), grass (a lot of as well) and scrubs (to much off…), we will start with our pavement and work our way to the back. I don’t want an exclusive garden, just something nice and manageable

No. 2 : Create a “Rocky-bird-bath-thingy”, cause I know it gonna look awesomely cool, just need to find a spot for it, which would not be that difficult, as space is in abundance at this stage.

No.3 : Do a mosaic-guitar for Hanco’s room, saw this on the internet, or maybe a book, or a shop, what ever, I can’t remember, but I don’t care, it looked stunning enough for me to save the images in my dusty old brain. I liked it and I’m going to do it…

And maybe there is more to be done, mind you, once you buy a house, there will always be stuff to do, things that need fixing, and little nooks and crannies that beg to be magically revamped into something breathtaking and magnificent

Searching for the “pause-button”…..

I completed the application forms for Gr-0 for H the other night….it broke my heart and left me with a turmoil of emotions. Where has time gone and what the hell did he do with my little baby? And if it were not too much to ask, would time mind just hitting the “pause-button”?


I need to savour of a few more moments, I need to recall and cherish a few more memories, and I need my littlest to be little just a tad bit longer…

But although it feels like I lost my grip on time, I have to admit that we do enjoy the littlest grown-up person he is turning into, for instance, the other night he assembled the track for the skylectric (which he got from grandpa) all on his own, and he did not do a bad job in doing so. After said track was assembled, I was proudly informed that “ek kan die pad myself bou want ek is ‘n groot seun mos”. It made me proud…knowing that he is attempting more things on his own and relying less and less on our help and assistance. I’m also encouraging him to try things for himself, rather than leaping in and showing him how to do it, cause I realised, as much as I hate it, maybe I need to let go….

We are in the process of converting the (only) tree in our back garden into a tree-house for Hanco, because come on, every little boy needs a tree house, a tree house that magically converts into a pirate’s ship that sails the seven seas, collecting precious treasures, or a space shuttle launching itself deep into space, flying between stars, milky ways and planets, a tree house to hide away from annoying little sisters, to camp-out in and do sleep-overs.

Oh yes, and I guess it is safe to say that we survived our first Valie-winter, never thought we would be able to say this, but yes, we survived.

I am madly, deeply, utterly in love with spring this year, spring signals new beginnings, away with the old and dusty and in with the new and blooming…

Unfortunately, our spring did not have a rosy and chirpy start to it, cause I was admitted to hospital on the 1st of September 2011 for a scheduled D&C….yes, unfortunately our pregnancy was terminated at just over 12 weeks due to medical reasons. To me as a mother, this was probably the MOST difficult decision I had to make, cause the ripples this stone cause in our little pond goes way beyond what the eye will ever be able to see. And the unconscious fight between Forgiveness vs. Guilt will linger in my being and my soul for days and nights to come. But we are all entitled too forgiveness, and although I know that my faith allowed me to be forgiven, I still have to allow myself to forgive

The love and support we received (and are still receiving) in these difficult times, is just overwhelming, family and friends (and yes, even cyber-space friends) reached out to us and touched our hearts and lives with their love, caring and support, and to all of them we will be forever grateful. I don’t think any dictionary or thesaurus will be able to explain the gratitude we have towards these people.

But we decided to keep our little boat afloat amidst the giant waves caused by this, we will keep sailing towards to sun, keep our heads up high and our faith even higher

…. cause the sun will always shine again tomorrow

Photo-board : Playing with grandpa's Army Gear

 

Creating a better B, one step at a time

Sometimes an action taken, a conversation spoken, a moment in time, can make you stop and start thinking. Thinking and asking if this is really the person you like to be. I had such a moment yesterday, and I realized that I am not completely satisfied with me, the person I am, and just there and then I decided that it is time to create a better me, not change, but just to become a better person. I want to lead my kids by example and actions, not with “because I told you so”….



"Do unto others as you would have others do unto you."

“Do not mess with Karma”

This will be my daily reminder, my guideline and my motivation.

I know I can do this, it is as easy as taking it one step and one day at a time.

A change is as good as a holiday....

I have done a lot of thinking over the last couple of weeks, maybe it is due to the fact that I will be turning 30 in a few months, or maybe due to the fact that I am pregnant for the 3rd time, or maybe it is just the hormonal imbalance mixed with “adulthood” that is causing all this craziness, but what ever this is causing, I am kind of enjoying all of this.

I am considering editing and reconstructing my blogs, maybe merging them, not only because I am limited by time these days, but also because my children are just a part of me than I am, therefore I don’t see the use of keeping them, the most precious part of me, separated. 

I find myself lost in blogs WAAAAYYYY to much these days, reading them over and over again, discovering new ones, getting inspired by them, creating new dreams and ideas because of what I see and what I read. I colored my hair, (sort of) manicured my nails, I’m collecting baking recipes like mad (not that I can bake by the way, but I need to try them all), I surfing the internet for DIY ideas for the new house, and I am going bonkers-mad to get my hands back on my camera again and going snapshot-crazy.

I’m trying to take a new approach regarding my kids as well, the interaction between us, inspiring them, broadening their horizons, stimulating their senses, and just trying in general to do things from a different perspective. Using the words “No” and “don’t” less and less, instead of saying “You’re not doing it right, come let me show you” rather say “you can do it, try again”, changing the negative into more positive.  Instead of fighting with Zhané trying to get her fed, rather give her the spoon and the freedom of trying it herself, and in the process of creating a mess, also give her the opportunity to learn and discover at the same time.

Our time at home gets filled with “side-walk” art, chalkboard dust floating in the air, toys decorating the hallway, bath-time bubbles, sibling chuckles and giggles. When things go hectic, when I’m wishing that I was able to transform into an eight-armed bionic woman, I’ll take a moment to watch Hanco’s little face fill with concentration as he creates yet another master piece out of his lego blocks and I’ll swoop Zhané into my arms and place her next to me on the kitchen-top counter to watch and play as mommy prepares dinner.

Maybe, just maybe, with 30 creeping up to me, I’m realizing that maybe there is more to life than having a clean kitchen with all the dishes done before you go to bed, maybe there is more to life than having everything in the house perfect and in its place. Life is what you make of it, and I want to make every minute count, fill every moment with laughter, joy, special moments, loving times, and doing all of this with a smile on my face. Yes, there will be difficult days, days filled with thunder and rain, but with the thunder and rain comes a rainbow-promise that the sun will shine again….

Happy 5th Birthday my Biekie-Baba!!

Verjaarsdagwense vir my liewe, lawwe Biekie-bouter

Mamma se boodskap op Facebook :
Today one year ago we entered a new chapter in life, we were blessed with a precious, littlest Biekie-bouter, the joys, love and blessings we received from her is endless! Very merry first birthday Zhané, we love you more than words can EVER describe!!


Happy FIRST birthday my sweet, littlest Biekie-bouter!
June 28 at 7:30am via BlackBerry ·

Melanie Coetsee Baie geluk met Zhane se eerste verjaardaggie!!! xx

Melinda Botha Veels geluk Zhanetjie. Ons is baie lief vir jou. xxxx

Elisca Coetsee Baie Baie geluk mt haar verjaarsdag, ons hoop pappa en mamma bederf haar verskriklik!!! Lovies Elisca en Johan

Kandis Durant happy happy big girl

Melissa Jordaan Oberholster Jacobs HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Deon Schaap Veels geluk Zhane, hoop dis n dag vol pret en prezzies. en baie liefde!

Melinda Botha baie geluk Zhanetjie. ons is baie lief vir jou.

Tertia Coetsee Baie geluk met Zhane met jou eerste verjaarsdag, geniet dit, hou hulle besig!

Deune Schutte Geluk mt klein biki-bouter se bday, hoop sy bring jul nog baie liefde enn geluk ini toekoms! Kani glo sy word so groot ni, tyd vlieg! X

Eileen Shaw Happy birthday precious girl x x

Siviwe Mxakaza Mbatha happy birthday twinnie from O

Erdna Kruger Happy birthday Z!!!!!

Nicky Meintjes happy birthday

Anita Schaap Happy biekie-birthday!

Yolande Carter Haasbroek Happy birthday xxx

Lea-Anne Clayton Happeeee birfday Zhane

Irene Mileham Broome Happy Happy Birthday beautiful girl may your toddler years be full of new discoveries and adventures

Marina Blignaut Baie geluk met gesiggie se verjaardsag vandag. Ek hoop sy bring julle al die vreugde en geluk in die lewe. Sy raak net te oulik...

Megan Moller Geluk met Zhane se verjaarsdag. Ek weet sommer dat sy julle nog baie jare van vreugde gan gee. Xx

Sheena Smolak Nee Brown Happy birthday precious little girl and congratulations mommy for doing such a brilliant job!

Michelle Claire Booysen happy birthday xx

Mel Honiball

Happy birthday vir daardie pragtige qutie pie van jou! My wens vir haar: Dat sy op die regte ouderdom eendag n wonderlike persoon sal ontmoet en die wonderlike ervaring van ware liefde vir die res van haar lewe sal ondervind!

Chantelle Ceronie

Baie geluk met sussie se 1ste verjaarsdag! Gee haar 'n soentjie van my af! XXX

Sheena Smolak Nee Brown

Happy Birthday to Zhané. I hope you all have a wonderful day and that the year ahead is truely blessed. xxxx

Mandri Wessels Olivier

Baie geluk met julle biekie bouter se eerste verjaarsdag! Mag sy vir julle nog baie vreugde bring!

Christine Wolmarans Hay

Veels geluk met jou bb se heel eerste verjaarsdag, Beniet. Ek glo sy is en sal vir altyd 'n vreugde en seen vir julle wees. Xx

Monzelle de Villiers

Baie geluk met Zhané se 1ste verjaarsdag! Mag dit 'n wonderlike dag wees. Ek glo sy word sommer hope bederf!

Lilian January

Happy birthday Zhane'. God's richest blessings to you and your parents and brother! Have a blessed day!

Elmarie Ceronie

Aan di mooiste kleindogter in di wereld, baie geluk Zhane met jou bday. Mag di jaar wat voorle net so mooi wees soos di jaar wat verby is. Mag Jesus jou styf toevou in Sy arms en oorvloedig seen. Lief jou baie xxx

****************************************

Zhané : Jou HEEL EERSTE Biekie-birthday!

Jy is 'n volle een jaar oud vandag!! Jy het vanoggend al dansend en wiegend op die bed gesit terwyl "Veels geluk liewe maatjie, omdat jy verjaar" se skewe note deur die kamer baljaar het.  Jip, jy is 'n drama-queen van formaat en het defnitief die aandag geniet, jy het ook ewe kordaat "ja" met jou koppie geknik toe jy gevra word of dit jou verjaarsdag vandag is, so asof jy presies verstaan waaroor als gaan, wat my eintlik nie sal verbaas nie.
Jy het al soveel mylpale behaal, en jy doen dit moet soveel entoesiasme en ywer, dat ek soms stilstaan en met verbasing jou aanstaar, want jy is eenvoudig net amazing!
Jy kan al op jou eie staan, en het al so een of twee treetjies aangedurf, maar nog nie veel meer as dit nie.  Jy begin ook al hoe meer en meer woordtjies kaf draf, soos : da-da, ma-ma, ba-ba, dans-dans, seun
Ons het vir jou laat oorbelle inskiet op jou 11-maande herdenking, en dit lyk te skattig, en gelukkig pas skattig by skattig, want ja, jy is skattig!
Hoop jy het jou daggie geniet, en mag jy net nog meer ons lewens met lag, plesier, vreugde en vrede vul, want om jou en boetie as my Biekies te hê is voorwaar my trotste oomblikke in die lewe!
Liefies jou my liewe, lawwe Biekie-bouter!

Lunar Eclipse (15/06/2011)

Being B, being a mom....

Although my blog is mainly Afrikaans, cause there is no better language to describe certain things than Afrikaans, I decided to do this post in English...

Ok, so it is 23h15, both kids finally asleep, after we struggled for about 2 hours to get H into bed, who complaint of ear-ache and sore legs, and I realized that as a mother, this is basically the only me-time I have. The only time to Facebook, bbm, bb-blog, read my Living & Loving mag, what ever.

I am one of those people who devote my whole being to being a mother and wife, there are few things in life just as, or more important to me than this. I thrive in placing my family above everything else and maintaining it that way.

Motherhood took me quite by surprise, as I was still fairly young (24) when I fell pregnant with H. None of our friends had kids, we were still basically newly-weds and have not even properly planned life ahead, never mind thinking of children...

But from the moment we met at birth, when he was placed on my chest, I knew this is where I was suppose to be.

And I enjoy every moment I have as a mother, and that is why we waited for almost 4 years before Z was born. I wanted to make sure that I was there for H in his first crucial years of development, he needed my undivided attention just as much as he needed our love.

And now, with him almost turning 5, he has developed into a smart, handsome, playful and loving little boy, with an imagination that is hard to put in words. He does not rely on us that much anymore, so I can shift my focus over to Z, who I might add, reached that very demanding stage of not being a baby anymore, but not yet a toddler...enough said

So with the blissful mid-night sounds of the tumble drier rumbling in the back ground, I lie in bed, bb in hand, and smile, cause the joys of motherhood does not only include the proud and happy moments, but also the difficult and daunting moments, the laughs and the tears. And I once again realize that I am truly blessed, that my quest in life is that of motherhood, and that I accept that quest with every loving fiber in my body, and that Being B, being me...is being a mother

Bugs en butterflies in die Biekie-bos

Daar is 'n geskarrel, daar is 'n geroer, mondtjies fluister...oortjies luister

In die Biekie-bos word daar beplan, gesoek en gedink, want daar gebeur een van die dae baie spasiale dinge in die Biekie-bos....

 

Jip, dit is amper Biekie-bouter se HEEL EERSTE verjaarsdag, en Biekie-Baba word amper 'n volle-handtjie VYF jaar oud!!

Mamma-Biekie skarrel verboureerd rond, bekommerd dat sy nie betyds als gereël gaan kry nie, sy wil seker maak dat als presies reg is vir Biekie-bouter se verjaarsdag, al gaan sy nie veel onthou nie, bly dit steeds haar HEEL EERSTE verjaarsdag. 

Mamma-Biekie het besluit om die hulp in te roep van goggas en bottervliegies, net om die spesiale dag so tikkie ekstra meer spesiaal te maak.

En na Biekie-bouter se vejaarsdag is dit amper Biekie-baba s'n.  Mamma-Biekie kan hom seker nie meer Biekie-baba noem nie, aangesien hy amper 'n hele handtjie-vol vyf gaan word.  Maar vir Biekie-Mamma sal hy altyd haar Biekie-baba bly.  Hy was tog mos immers haar heel eerste Biekie!

En so deur al die geskarrel deur, kan Mamma-Biekie dit nie help om tog so bietjie stil te sit en verlore te raak in al die wonderlike gedagtes van haar Biekie's nie, want al bly hul haar Biekie's is sy sommer net biekie-baie lief vir hulle!

Wanneer is net nog een te veel?

Hoe kan als in 'n oogwink van 'n great aand saam met vriende en familie in 'n aand van choas verander?? Wanneer net nog een, een te veel word...
Wanneer "net nog een" die lewe van 'n onskuldige persoon in 'n oogwink verander, hul hele bestaan deurmekaar ruk, en verwoesting, hartseer, trane en verwyt agter gelaat word...
Wanneer die bande van jarelange vriendskappe beproef word en op die prys gestel word vir "net nog een"...
Wanneer onskuldige kinders aan die wrede monsters van die lewe moet blootgestel word en met onskuldige, maar tog vreesaanjaende ogies, na dit wat besig is om te ontvou, moet kyk...
Wanneer geld nie meer 'n prys het nie, net solank daai persoon wat seer het, gehelp kan word
Wanneer 'n mens so hulpeloos voel, maar tog als in jou vermoe doen om dinge net beter te maak, en net erens 'n beginpunt soek om al die skerwe bymekaar te maak en weer aanmekaar te sit...

Dit wat ek die naweek beleef het en moes deurmaak, wens ek niemand toe nie, dit is traumaties om die minste te se. Dit laat jou besef wie en wat in die lewe vir jou belangrik is en wat mens nie als sal doen om dit te beskerm nie.
Ek het nog nooit my ma so weerloos gesien soos wat ek die naweek gedoen het nie. Haar krete van hulp en pyn gaan by my vir die res van my lewe spook, dit gaan my nooit alleen los nie, dit gaan my nooit laat vergeet nie.
Die feit dat ek as ouer toegelaat het dat my kind aan sulke omstandighede blootgestel was, gaan my vir altyd laat wonder of ek as ouer nie my kind gevaal het nie...
Sy was en is onskuldig, sy het dit nie verdien nie, maar tog is sy vandag die een wat met die nagevolge daarvan sit, tog is sy die een wat in die koue hospitaalbed le en wag vir verdere nuus.
Ek wens ek kon dit als verhoed of vermy op een of ander stadium, wens ek was daar op daai presiese oomblik om haar te beskerm teen die seer. Maar ek kon nie...

Dit wat gebeur het, bly in my kop maal en maal, as ek stil word hoor ek dit, as ek my oe toemaak, sien ek dit. Ek kry nie ontsnap daarvan nie, die kloue van wreedheid klem my nog te styf vas.

Wanner is "net nog een" een te veel...

BB blogging

Ok, so kom ons kyk of dit werk, first time for everything...
Sit vanaand by 'n b-day braai in Pretoria. Heerlik om weer terug te wees in Pretoria, maar ek voel ewe skielik stok-oud. Want 99% van die mense om my is studente of pas gegradueer. Chats van jool, vlotte en koshuise vul die lug. Jong verliefdes staar diep in mekaar se oë, verlore. Ek voel so half alleen, en ek mis my kids. Ek ken nie van vlot-bou of jool nie, en is steeds verlief, maar nie meer verlore. En alhoewel hierdie post op hierdie stadium vir my geen sin maak nie, net so maak die feit dat ek vanaand hier is, vir my ook geen sin nie.
Maar nou ja, my doel was om my bb-blogging te toets, so let's toast to that...

Zhané : Doop (03/04/2011)

Ons het jou op die 3de April 2011 laat doop. Alhoewel jy nog te klein is om te verstaan waaroor dit gaan en waarom ons dit doen, het mamma en pappa ‘n plig teenoor Liewe Jesus om jou so na aan Sy Woord as moontlik groot te maak, dit is basies ons manier om vir Hom dankie te sê vir die wonderlike voorreg wat ons gegun is om ‘n mamma en pappa te kan wees, en hoeveel ons het om voor dankbaar te wees.

Ouma Hettie het vir jou die mooiste moontlike rokkie gemaak, en jy het soos ‘n klein prinsessie in jou rok gelyk!

Ouma en Oupa Botha het van die Kaap af gekom vir jou doop (eintlik vir Oom Rayner se grade-plegtigheid, maar ten minste was hul hier om die groot dag saam met ons te kon vier). Hulle het vir die hele naweek by ons gekuier, en dit was so lekker dat hulle ook bietjie die kans kon kry om tyd saam met jou en boetie te spandeer. Ek is seker dat hulle julle sommer verskriklik baie mis

Oupa Deon het jou by die kerk ingedra, wat vir mamma trane in haar oë gegee het, dit was so great en spesiaal! Ek sou graag dat hy vir boetie ook die kerk kon indra met sy doop, maar dit is Oupa Hardus se voorreg gewees, oor dit die eerste kleinseun aan pappa se kant van die familie was. Maar gelukkig het Oupa Deon die keer ook ‘n beurt gekry.

Ons het so lekker saam gekuier met jou doop, saam met al ons wonderlike familie en vriende het ons die kans gehad om hierdie baie spesiale dag van jou vier!

Mamma en Pappa is so geseën om twee sulke wonderlike kinders soos jy en boetie in ons lewens te hê, ons kan ons nie 'n oomblik sonder julle indink nie en als wat ons doen, doen ons ter wille van julle, want julle verdien ons onverdeelde aandag en liefde, want julle is ons geluk, vreudge en seëninge!